's also in the pudding.

Ever wanted to pack up what you own, or don’t, and take off to the coast? A month ago, I was offered a Job in a non-disclosed location (sorry but I like mystery). I had planned to move but this offer ripened my timing so I aggressively started to seek couch crashing for a few months. Just before that call, I was ignorantly driving a broken car from my recently leased, not-moved-in apartment to a rehearsal for a line of shows scheduled up until the night before my start date. I was also mid-swing in a bloody knife fight with my student loan repayment while recording and writing the next string of unfinished songs. To a point – I was busy and planned to get busier.

My sister has always been undeniable in her support for me. Upon sharing what I thought was terrific news – moving in five minutes - she offered a calm appeal: are you being patient? I was ready to spit fire, but despite my jaw now lowered in wild offense, nothing came out. That’s because she was onto something. I was not. I am not.

Pharrell Williams of N.E.R.D. eloquently puts it best in brief memo for the song Lemon, “The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.” And it did.

I don’t feel like accepting patience. I feel like accepting, as I always do, the next HOT opportunity. Because that’s how we’re conditioned. Some of us, especially in the creative community, spend years training ourselves to do everything that we can with little rest in between laps. So I learned to run a marathon on a mile’s share of oxygen. But form gets compromised, and when it does, I have a habit of taking on things that ironically jeopardize a better version of the future. Hindsight 20/20, here. If it weren’t for my sweet and direct sister, I could’ve lost course for merit.   

I’m learning how to be patient and while things can still be demanding, I stop for air. I find that practicing through small attainable steps can leave an impression for bigger decisions. And like some old boring but right person once espoused, it’s the small things that count. I like to cook a new meal from scratch whenever I’m home instead of ordering delicious pizza like I used to. And when I do find my way to a golden pie, I’m patient with myself at the gym without adding some Olympic counter to my planned but effective routine. What’s really sweet is when I finish easy tasks, like finally moving in, I gain footing in being patient with how I feel…how I speak to people with emotional intake…and how much more I get done. It’s working?

I didn’t take the job. Because of it, doors have flung wide flipping open, some of which allowed me to submit my final student loan payment. I didn’t have a ton, but I definitely could’ve used that several grand for a state of the art home studio along with a trip, is all I’m saying. What I’m not saying is to ignore opportunities when they come. I’ll probably see another something come, soon, and I’ll absolutely consider. But I’m working to get to that place where my jump is in sure faith, rather than in F.O.M.O (The Fear Of Missing Out). They say that grind is recipe to much success. I believe it. But when the results don’t show, try some good ol’ fashioned patience. There are things already in motion for us and neither you nor I can see it all. If you like science or not, refer to the First Law of Thermodynamics – energy cannot be created or destroyed. We're just tapping into what’s already here, baby. Relax.

Here's The Spencer Lee Band in the studio recording a new song I'm vibing to all day.


Tevin Williams